This nanny nation.

Every time I go to collect a child from school, go to a play group or walk through a shop the first thing I notice is 60% of the children I see are white children clinging onto a black or hispanic woman, the next thing I notice as I walk past is 20% of the children are talking to a woman with a strong foreign accent then it is only the remaining 20% - if that - that appear to be with their biological parents. So who are all these other women with these children, surely adoption is not that popular over here, people do still give birth to their children and keep them for themselves? The answer is that all of these women with the children are all the Nannies; the nannies, the au-pairs, the babysitters, either way for some reason this is a really popular option for childcare over here. Now I am not saying this is a bad thing, far from it, I'd be out of a job if this were the case. 

71 % of mothers with children under the age of 18 work in the USA according to a study brought out in 2007, comparing this to the 68% of mothers in the UK in 2008, it is not like you can say it is because there is a huge difference in the amount of working mothers between the two countries. 

Some could argue that this is because compulsory education starts for children aged 4 in england compared to 6 in the USA so no nanny is needed, except for the fact that most of the nannies I have met have all been collecting their 2 year old from "School".

So why is this method trusted above childminders or other day care offerings that are used in the UK? It has been something I have been wondering about a-lot since arriving here. I think the main answer is the flexibility of an au-pair and the ability to really find out what this person is doing all day with your children, when they are in your own home.

Let me explain, if you have an au-pair that lives with you, doesn't go out much, and you really need to attend a function in the evening but don't want to hire a babysitter which can charge up to and above $20 per hour and don't have any family around, you can say to the au-pair, we are going out tonight and she (or he) will be there to babysit, and as they are not leaving their home to do this for you its not like you are asking them to go really out of their way, the only possible issue is clashing plans. The second point I made is referring to the invention of the "Nanny cam" I don't have one, but I know people who do. This is where the family set up cameras around the house and film the nanny so they can really find out what he/she is doing with your children in the time you are away from the home. The great part about this is it is 100% legal and you do not even need to tell your nanny or au-pair that you are filming them. 

Another great thing about having an au-pair or nanny is that they can focus on your children, they do not  have their attention shared with 8 other children, so they can get to know your children inside and out and they get to the level where they can be totally in sync with your child much faster than if they were with a childminder for example. The au-pair or nanny can be like a third parent in a way, they are there for when your child wakes up in the morning and can stay until they fall asleep at night. 

So why hasn't this culture merged its way into the UK? I still don't know, I expect this is much more expensive than a day care centre or a childminder, but when you think of the level of care they provide and the amount of hours they work, taking into consideration the agency fee of $7,000 you are paying the au-pair $3.10 an hour. Obviously the cost of housing someone is more than that, but purely based on the hourly wage, I can't see how any other option can be much cheaper. 

School's out!

This has been one crazy week, Tabatha graduated from kindergarten and the next day Elizabeth graduated from her pre-school and will now join her sister in the local Jewish private school. It is great having the kids at home and we are having a really good time, but I still have another week before camp starts and am running out of ideas of what I can do with them. So far we have filmed 35 minutes of footage and managed to compress it down to a 7 minute long movie called "Fancy LaLa- Princess Makeover" I then made it into a DVD for their parents and grandparents complete with credits, a dvd menu, outtakes and photographs of the girls which included a photo-shoot I did with Tabatha after she was all dressed up with makeup and her hair done. I edited the photos so they looked professional, and that made the parents very happy.
We made yummy kosher cupcakes, and after making the mix realised there was enough for 38 people, so everyone who came to the house this week was offered about 3 cupcakes. The next day we made purple playdoh and I was pleasantly surprised to find it turned out just like shop bought playdoh. Just to make sure the creative juices kept flowing we then made a money box out of an old breadcrumb tin.

  Friday came and I could finally meet my fellow European friend who by sheer coincidence is also staying in New York, I cannot tell you how good it was to see a familiar face! It was a real shame however, as we had planned to go to a gig together in the evening but due to bad weather and bad directions from people on the street my friend did not arrive until after the last band had finished. It did mean that I as I was waiting for her I got chatting to a very lovely man from Manchester who gave me his number and said he can let me know about good nights that are age appropriate in the city.
On Saturday after dropping my friend off at Pen station I head over to brooklyn to find this house I mentioned in my last blog.  It was a really odd feeling as I was walking down the street, I knew exactly where I was going as I had already been down these roads before when I had google earth on full screen. The area was a little more run down than I had imagined and it was a pretty dead area but still I kinda liked it, it would be somewhere I wouldn't mind living as it was a really nice distance away from the city. The house itself was much smaller than I had thought it would be and was kinda crooked but it was so cool actually seeing it, a really bazaar thing that I thought would never happen.

Today was Elizabeth's birthday party, we had 36 people in our back yard half of those all being under the age of 3. It was a really nice day however, all the children were really well behaved and got along well with eachother, it was also nice meeting some of the Moms. One Mom I spoke to had an au-pair arrive at her house on Thursday afternoon and had left again by Friday despite my best efforts and many other people who were trying to help her which was a real shame and hard especially as camp doesn't start for another week, so this poor woman is now left with a full time job and 3 kids with no childcare. With any luck they will rematch soon, her son stood next to me today and let out a loud "Hrmp" sound, I looked at him and he exclaimed "You know it was like she just took a sleepover on the other side of the world."  it must be hard for them. Life goes on I guess and its better she left now then when the kids are already really attached to her.

I have no real plans for the coming week, just searching the net for crafts activities and lots and lots of playdates.

I live in the USA.

Not much to report this week, I have just been out driving as much as I can and finally getting used to the strange roads around here, though I still prefer to walk many places. It has really sunk in now that this is now my home, England is a long, long way away and I shall not see the beautiful english countryside for at least a year, which saddens me but gives me a huge sense of empowerment.
 I bought a ukulele last week and have been trying to play that and I think I am starting to get alright at it, but I definitely need some help as the internet is not providing me with everything I need.
What I am really excited about is next weekend, when I was 14/15 I decided I would like to live in New York at some point in my life, I then went onto many real estate websites searching through homes that I would like to live in, I finally found one in park slope, the neighbourhood looked lovely, the inside of the house had artwork painted onto the walls and the best part about the house I thought, was that it looked like nothing special from the outside, you had to own it to understand the magic inside. Now unfortunately I cannot go into it, and I never would have dreamed that I would ever be able to see it, but now I am a New Yorker, I can't just not go and have a look at my fantasy house!
I also am very lucky as since arriving I have wanted to go to Coney Island, last night I received a message from a friend, a fellow european whom I have known for years and is also currently staying in NY so we will be going to Coney Island together :) The only thing I hope for is, I have heard it is a must that when you go, you should eat a hotdog from their famous diner, so with any luck they will serve veggie dogs.
At the moment I am trying to compile a list of places to go and how much it will cost me, which is a very hard task as I keep looking at my small pile of savings and wanting to just go to the mall and go on the most expensive shopping trip ever. So if anyone has any suggestions they would be greatly appreciated.

Homesick

This week I began to feel homesick, it is the strangest feeling though. I don't actually want to go home, more I would like to drive on English roads again, or I would like to randomly phone a friend on their mobile for a chat, or text someone I have known for more than a month and meet up with them.
It used to really bother me when I was in the UK that the majority of people that knew me had seen me grow up, I hated it, in fact that was one of the influencing factors that made me decide to move this far away, however now I kind of miss that. You have to reinvent yourself, you become so conscious of how you appear to the outside world, I am walking around and talking to people in a manor that I do not recognise as myself.
Its odd suddenly being single for the first time in 3 years, being in a new environment, being in a new family, living in a new home. It definitely takes some getting used to, for example the whole concept of living with your employers is something that takes a little while to get your head around.
Also what also strikes me is this feeling of loneliness I have despite the fact I have a nice group of friends around me, one of which I just spent the whole weekend with as she slept at mine for two nights. It is also hard to imagine this feeling going away, even though I know it has to and is perfectly normal I am really not sure how to deal with it. The worst part is I almost feel guilty for feeling like this, I mean I love the children I look after I get on well with the parents, I like my new home, I am obsessed with the city so what do I have to be sad about? And it just hits me at the strangest moments, for example yesterday I was at a party and having an amazing time, then suddenly towards the end of the night, even though I was still enjoying myself I just couldn't feel like I could talk to anyone, I felt embarrassed of my accent I didn't know how I was supposed to behave in a large group of people when the person I knew best there I had only met 3 hours before hand. I loved the atmosphere and it was a really amazing night but i just had this really strong feeling to go home and just go to sleep.
I am determined however not to let this feeling over shadow the lovely weekend I just had, my friend and I went to the bitter end on friday night where we saw some truly magnificent bands and were then later joined by two other au-pairs. I was even able to meet a member of one of the bands and bag a free CD :) The next day, going on a suggestion from the stated musician, my friend and I headed off to brooklyn to what we were told was going to be a music festival, which I guess it kind of was, but nothing that happened after we decided to go went to plan. We took the subway on a route which was supposed to get us there in 30 minuets instead of the usual 45 minuets if you only took two trains. So we got off the second subway and made our way to the platform where we were supposed to catch the third, only to find that the line was closed for the weekend, we then had to go to a station in brooklyn walk 1/4 mile to a bus stop where we would catch a shuttle bus then catch another subway before we could walk the last part of the journey, the whole thing ended up taking us over 2 hours. It did mean we were able to see a bit of brooklyn which both of us loved, it had an amazing vibe to it and felt really raw, unlike the very polished and tourist friendly times square, this was finally america for the americans and not for tourists.
We finally made our way to the "festival" to find it being a stage set up in the middle of the road with about 40 people gathered around it, after the first band finished playing we followed the crowd round to the back yard of the house it was in front of to find another stage with just a handful of people sitting around on the grass listening. After a few hours the place was packed, we met some lovely and interesting people and laughed about how all the guys looked the same, all had dark floppy hair, beards and flannel shirts. The night then took many strange twists and turns which ended with my friend running towards me shouting "its so good to see you!" and us holding hands all the way to grand central as we both felt so ill we had to support each other walking. No idea what made us sick as both of us have had this horrible stomach thing for two weeks appearing in the exact same way, now most would assume maybe we had a stomach virus that we kept passing from one to the other which would make sense, except for the fact that I haven't seen her for 3 nearly 4 weeks and when we met then we spent barely any time together. Hmmm it seems the USA makes us poor Europeans ill hahha.